Wednesday, 29 June 2011

Dads in Distress and sacred cows of Australia!

To all DIDSS members and friends of Dads in Distress
I would like to remind you of the amazing efforts Bill Kosmopoulos has put in to prepare himself for his first ever triathlon in Bali next week. Bill flys out of Australia Tuesday and sends this message;
I'm writing to let you know that finally after 4 months of sweat, blood and tears, I'm departing for Bali this Tuesday morning to participate in the International Bali triathlon.

As mentioned, I'm extremely grateful, fortunate and humble with the support i've received throughout this crazy journey.

This challenge has served many purposes such as raising funds, exposure to my chosen charity and perhaps self development and I have no regrets.

I thank you for reading my blogs and your emails of support have been overwhelming to say the very least. I've attracted a substantial amount of media interest and I hope I've done it justice.

I will be updating my blog daily whilst in Bali with some insights and laughters so make sure you jump on my website.
For more details go to the following link on our website extracted from our recent newsletter, and see how you can support Bill and DIDSS.
Get Behind Bill!
Bill Kosmopoulos has proven he is not crazy, just committed. The 40 year old former dad in distress is more comfortable on the couch than running a triathlon, but he is willing to endure training in Melbourne's Winter to enter the Bali International in searing heat on June 26. Why? And why should we get behind him?
Thanks to Bill and to everyone supporting him.
Barry Guidera
CEO Dads in Distress Inc

Holy Cow!: Cows More Important Than Children in Australia.........and no we didn't mean this one!

(Click on this blogs title to read more on this article)

Friday, 24 June 2011


Whilst we wait for the Ministry of Justice in London to deliberate over their findings during the Family Justice Review, and for these to be published in the Autumn, I believe we should all campaign for similar reviews to take place and robust reforms to follow in Australia, Canada, New Zealand , USA, Singapore, Greece and anywhere else in the world this injustice lurks!!

Click on this blogs title and Lobby your leader today!

Keep an eye on my policital blog here;

Thursday, 23 June 2011

Family Justice Review:dea​dline 23rd June 2011: Summery!

Dear Mr. Norgrove,
I wonder if just a few months is enough to fully consider all the facts relating to this enormous subject,I feel it is such a mammoth task more time may be required and I offer you all my research gleaned over the past 7 years and 3 years of publishing my findings from first hand experiences as well as other people's testimonies.

The misgivings I have uncovered in the family law system not only here in the UK but across the world has ramifications most especially on our young, their families and society as a whole and I hope the endeavours of your review will see it as a matter of urgency that these injustices are addressed and not some cost cutting expediency for this coalition Government. ( I apologise for my cynicism but years at the wrong end of family law will do that to a man!) Many of my contemporaries consider this could just be a fudge or whitewash but after completing the very detailed questionnaires last September feel this review should be given a chance and I was gratified for the final question which read 'what question should we have asked if you feel something has been missed?' to which I replied that I hoped you will consider the number of suicides that take place each year ( In Australia where records are kept 16,000 people have taken their lives through Family Court failure and CSA intimidation since November 2007 ) I would suggest in the UK and Canada the totals are probably double that in the USA it runs into 100,000's where the correlation between returning service personnel who then have to face broken relationships at home is just to much for one man to bear!!

Legal Professionals: There is great incentive for Solicitors and indeed Barristers rather then seek conciliation to cause still further agitation in sensitive matters as they can then make the most of the legal aid budget or rendering a parent, most often the father, bankrupt, all under the watchful scrutiny, of the Judge but of course all behind the secret family court. There is now a call for these judges to be scrutinised and courts to be opened up using the same safeguards as in criminal courts (Child A etc). I know you commended the work of theses so called professionals in your early considerations, but please look again as there is a darker side to this industry then I believe you are aware.
Grandparents: Once again I was dismayed by your early findings which much maline Grandparents.The role of the Grandparents is vital and I believe holds the key to fundamental reform of our failing Family Court system. Why is there such widespread Social Services or CAFCASS intervention in hitherto normal families? Surely if parents are experiencing difficulties the priority in the child's true best interest (not necessary the same as the court mantra wheeled out time and again.) is to keep the children within family care and Grandparents or extended family seems a more prudent and beneficial way to offer children stability then to rely on spurious snap shot reports from strangers which weak judges rely upon for their judgements.Grandparents should be equally responsible as parents in such cases and the law should reflect this.

Police: The Police have no real role in Family law proceedings and will admit as much , they are unable to enforce a court order on a mother who withholds her children in spite of dad standing there with his court orders waving over his head Chamberlain style ( and as much worth as the letter the war time leader was holding then) The Police unable to act will caution such a father that he could be arrested for breaching the peace and should return matters to court, but what for if the court order he has is not worth the paper it is written on?

CAFCASS: In my view should be disbanded as they have become lackeys or scapegoats for judges who can point to their reports when things go wrong, as they all too often do. Rather then rely on Social Services at all the courts should have access to previous family history records from a family doctor, so false allegations that emerge at these sensitive times can swiftly be quashed!

CSA : Should also in my opinion be disbanded as not only has it failed for over 20 years the tactics they employ are little more the draconian which I have likened to Gestapo and KGB as there is no accountability for their Sex discrimination Race discrimination or their breaches of human rights. Financial matters should be settled at court as part of the summing up process and in conjunction with contact and PR agreements.

I hope the Family Justice Review has recognised Parental Alienation which most often happens when the so called resident parents stops the so called absent parent (new name required here) is stopped from enjoying contact with his children ( More often Fathers but on occasion Mothers ) it should be outlawed as the psychological child abuse it is when a parent uses their own children as ransom to attain more money from a father or the system as she will show she is sole parent in spite of court orders to the contrary. Once again something the CSA will accept without the need to purse all the facts!

False allegations of abuse or violence should be dealt with as robustly as the genuine cases they undermine, and again Family GP records should be admissible to court or at least to the judge when it is clear there were no incidents before one parent wants to earn more kudos in this arena.

The solution I have arrived at for sometime and by coincidence a fellow campaigner did in Canada is to make legal aid available to both parties at the outset and one court appearance to be included in that cost. This will then focus minds on both parents doing the right thing for their children including contact arrangements and financial matters there after if a party wishes to return matters to court it has to be at their own expense and only refundable if proven that the alternative parent has not acted appropriately and stiff penalties for either parent who fails to adhere to the letter and spirit of the court order. This should mean no requirement for CAFCASS, SS or CSA intervention as long as the orders until the children reach secondary school age (12) can be enforced.

Family Courts should be opened to press and public scrutiney with the same safeguards in place for sensitive criminal cases but it is the Judges who we need to scrutinised. Once and for all recognise the biased and bigotry that exists in this industry and there should be law that makes both parents equal and responsible for their children in to adult hood. Mothers do not always know best and childhood is such a short span of time, lets get it right in their true best interest!
I rest my case!

( View davey's campaigning site by clicking on this blogs title above)

Wednesday, 22 June 2011

Family Justice Review deadline 23rd June 2011: Social Services
Why is so much faith put in Social Services when children are involved in Family Court as when it all goes wrong all they have to do is role out that same old mantra " We will learn from this and move on !" well they do move on but rarely learn from it and even get compensated when they themselves get it wrong, and they in turn act as scapegoats for failing family court judges who can then sight their inaccurate reports as to why they made their (all too often irreversible) judgements!

I wonder why Social Services are called upon to report on fairly mild cases in family law. If there were previous cases of violence or abuse this would be on record as a matter of fact and once again why is it most often assumed it is Dad who is the abuser? In the 7 years I have been researching this subject I have found more women abuse then men and all to often it is the hidden abuse of psychology that a mother will use to 'persude' a child to act in such a way when even a relatively young child knows it to be wrong, but fears going against the resident parent as he/she has to live with that parent daily. The cruelest of abuse is Parental Alienation something Social Services doesn't even recognise yet whilst it allows a vindictive parent to use a child like a tool or even a weapon and at the worst extreme for ransom it is left to the non resident parent to anticipate the regret those children will feel in later life,those lost years in the relatively short span of time that is childhood that can never be replaced.

I believe Courts should have access to past medial records from the family doctor as this would quickly show up the false allegations that arise in family court so one parent may take advantage over another false allegations should also be dealt with as a crime and severe action including prison should be imposed even if it means taking the mother away from the children , she may then realise she is not serving her kids best interest by lying!

What chance have were mere lay people in this corrupted industry, when even those at the head of legal departments in Social Services fail to serve the children's best interest as that of this Council Leader

(Click on blog title to read more on this!)

Family Justice Review deadline 23rd June 2011: Legal Professionals.

At a time when the watchword should be conciliation and balance and maybe just a slight sway toward 'equal' parenting responsibilities this already biased arena will be made more of a battle ground thanks to, rather then in spite of, the legal professional when they become involved!

The Family Solicitors seem able to act with impunity, if you challenge their actions even when working for you there is very little that can be done as I found out to my cost. The law society who are supposed to regulate malpractice in the legal profession are all to often be reluctant to act as they know the solicitor can sue them, whilst there are no punitive measures the legal guardians can take.

Solicitors will agitate matters more so they can plunder the legal aid pot for mum whilst sending dad bankrupt!

Barristers also realise their lifestyles may be enhanced by further conflict so fail to seek conciliation in sensitive family court matters , and why should they at fees in the region of £2000 for a 10 minuet court appearance who would seek to resolve matters when you have a judge ready to lap it all up as they expect and 80% of the time against the dad and 100% not in the best interest of the children involved!

Police are ill equipped to deal with civil matters and are quick to acknowledge this as any action they take will soon move from a mother failing to adhere to a court order but rather seek to arrest dad who happens to have turned up at his prescribed contact time and it is so much easier to arrest him for breach of the peace. Further biased in this industry shows they consider mum civil and dad criminal and once again the need of the children are ignored or more often coerced as they are compelled to say what the resident parent (most often mum) has groomed them to say regardless of fact.

We need civil enforcement officers who are able to act as a go between or mediator but with the teeth to enforce a court order equally on either offending parent not just penalising dad and depriving quality time which could be so essential to the young as they rise through their educational terms and face many dangers, peer and media pressures a reassuring dad should be on hand to say! All this could of course be prevented and big savings made (the true motive for this review rather then seeking justice I fear) and I would invite you to read my views on the final chapter in this series 'Summery' that will appear on the final day of submissions on this blog on Thursday 23rd June 2011.

I will refer more to this so called legal professional from Hertford in my next blog relating to Social Services;

Tuesday, 21 June 2011

Family Justice Review deadline 23rd June 2011: Family Court.

When I first entered family Court in March 2004 the presiding judge on the day His Honour judge Hayward-Smith. I wondered what all the fuss was about as I found a judge here who told the opposing Barrister to ".. sit down as it seemed clear to him that in this case it was the father who was seeking to offer stability and maintain a Status Quo for his children in spite of separation!"
It took another 7 months however to attain that status quo in the form of a court order that spelled out in clear terms that having been granted Parental responsibility (a given to all parents on birth certificates since then) both parents should enjoy a joint residency order, shared care agreement and 50/50 access to both children what could be more in the children's best interest then equal access to both parents living in close proximity to each other and equal distance to the schools, certainly till both children were of a mature age, probably at secondary school (present day) to make their own minds up as to which parent to visit on particular days and not so rigid as this order designed to offer routine and stability in their former years. His Honour Judge Vilgeon (who reminded me a little of Leo J Carroll who stared as Mr Waverly in Man from Uncle) summed up the day with what he described as fatherly advice that it was now incumbent on both of us to make this order work, something I was swift to embrace whilst the mother was determined to undermine it form day one in March to that day, 20th October 2004 when she set about unravelling this hard fought for order in the best interest ( I had hoped ) for our children!

From that date to present day the mother, with the aid of a particularly biased judge in the form of Her honour Judge Pearl , unravelled all that work with such insistence that contact, which had been via school collection and return time so as to avoid conflict, now become adjacent to the former family home which was sure to cause conflict. It was like this judge and the so called impartial CAFCASS reporter had become my ex partners own special advisers and whilst I struggled to keep up to her demands as well as legal bill I found the hoops they expected be to jump through became smaller and smaller till it was impossible!
Today in spite of that original order that remains in place the mother has withheld my children for 45 months with impunity and from the perspective of HHJ Pearl actively condoned her Parental Alienation which extends to the extended family, school, doctors police and anyone else who becomes involved, whilst all the time it was meant to offer the children, who I believe most right minded people would agree, stability structure and as near normal family life in their best interest.

I tried to take matters to a further court to have this systematic destruction stopped but it was clear from the out set one judge would not over-rule another, yet this is exactly what Pearl did to Vilgeon and there is no mechanism available to enforce the order on the mother yet when I turned up for contact at the prescribed time and place with my order waved above my head almost Chamberlain style, as with the war time Prime Minister it was not worth the paper it was written on and in fact I was nearly arrested for breach of the peace when it was her not adhering to the letter and principle of what HHJ Vilgeon had offered in 2004.

The advice from the ill informed police was to return matters to court as they saw it as a civil matter as far as the mother was concerned, yet they were quick to try to make Dad a criminal as they can administer this easier themselves.
So my question to Lord Justice Ward and his cronies who bleat on about;
"Vengeful mothers leave good fathers powerless to see child," says judge
who is it but these failing law makers who are expected to put this right and in these times of supposed equality why can't Family Court orders be enforced on both parent rather then just dads? It is time the secrecy that hides the corruption and biased bigotry in these courts be exposed as in any other walk of life they would be regarded as sex discrimination, race discrimination and a breach of fundamental human rights especially against the children who's voices are never heard, yet these hypocrites claim to serve their best interest. If this is the case open the courts to public scrutiny as with criminal courts and in especially sensitive cases the media instructed to describe them as Child A, Child B, Family XYZ or use a press Id code relating to a specific Court orders otherwise this system along with it's accomplices in the form of CSA ,CAFCASS, Social Services and the money greedy legal professionals will continue to act like latter day gestapo of KGB with impunity!

What could be more appropriate for a Father but to defend those he holds most dear? His Children!

Monday, 20 June 2011

Family Justice Review deadline 23rd June 2011: Parental Alienation

Not too helpful Mr. Cameron!
(Click on blog title to read the background to this article)

I had hoped comments such as those passed by our leader the Rt Hon David Cameron PM this father's Day, were going to be lost in the myths of time following the departure of Messer's Harman and Balls (Both of them, Mr. & Mrs that is). But no the same old rhetoric is being purveyed as this Government clearly sees that there are more votes to be had from single mothers then dads who have done all they can through the courts, as well as trying to retain their sanity and offer normal lifestyles to those they hold most dear, their kids!

Yet on the whim of a selfish self serving mother the law empowers to enact their vengeance time and again with impunity whilst the father all to often on modest wage is made to pay and pay to the point of ruin just to have some parental responsibility for his kids in a world fraught with danger as well as media and peer pressures. In spite of being jointly responsible for my children, the mother can with hold the children with no chance of redress from the courts, and systematically drip drip poison in their young impressionable minds, as I learned today from school, my son's want nothing to do with me in spite of me receiving a happy Father's day card from my step daughter yesterday, 45 months to the day since I last had any form of contact with my son's. The pain this has inflicted on me I would not wish on any of my fellow man, and yet even in the face of this adversity actions such as returning their cloths, toys and equipment to them in the belief they would soon out grow them or may wish to have them after a few moths absence, was done in good faith by me, whilst the mother will interperate this as " See he doesn't want to know you after all!" God I would give a limb just to see my own father, who would have been the same age as the Duke of Edinburgh, back in my life for just one day, so you can imagine what I would (and have done) for my own sons just a few moments on a football touch line for instance, is that too much to ask?

Mr. Cameron continued his sanctimony by saying how his own father had inspired him,

well I have news for him so did my own father who I am sure would rock in his grave if he was aware that the freedoms that he and many others fought for in the 1940's were now allowing Parental Alienation to become the mainstream of our society and a Government that was puny in opposition , show the same traits now when they should be showing robust leadership on a most fundamental of issues affecting our seldom heard children TODAY!

I will be submitting my final items to David Norgrove and his Family Justice Review this Thursday, 23rd June and they may be followed here too;
I also wish Sir Bob Geldof would speak out again on this at this crucial time!

Saturday, 18 June 2011

Happy Father’s Day?

45 months to the day since my children were wilfully withheld as the Family Law system allows a mother to alienate her children from a loving Father just so she can claim to be a sole carer, and in spite of court orders to the contrary, this kind of injustice must end, how much more anticipated regret has a father got to take for his kids?
(Click on this blog's title for more on the Family Justice Review)
Follow the summery titles throughout this blog on what the Family Justice Review should be considering by the 23rd June 2011!

Thursday, 16 June 2011

The feminist trojan horse in Family Law

As a brief departure from my series aimed at the Family Justice Review which closes on 23rd June 2011, They will receive my series so please comment on these items or send your stories to the media blog on my sister blog. My thanks goes to Steve Allcock for the heads up on this crucial piece from Australia;

(Lessons could be learned here for David Norgrove at the UK Ministry of Justice)

Federal Member for Dawson George Christensen attacks the Gillard Labor government's changes to the Family Law Act which will water down provisions giving non-custodial parents (mostly fathers) equal access to their children.

It is right this should find a wider audience and indeed that Australia as well as many other countries in the world undergo similar reviews hopefully leading to reform as in the UK right now , I hope I have done this justice Steve and please take a look at what is occurring on my sister ship by clicking on this blog title!

Friday, 10 June 2011

Family Justice review: Deadline 23rd June 2011 : CAFCASS

CAFCASS (click blog title for more) is in effect court appointed social workers who are instructed to make a snap-shot of your family then make a report with far reaching and long term consequences for your family who may never recover from in a life time.

Although I only had limited contact with this erroneous organisation, I was given the heads up by my McKenzie friend, the late Ian Mackay, spokesperson for Families need Fathers who pointed out that my 'impartial' court reporter, who at my final hearing that lasted from 9:00 am to 4:00pm spent 90% of the time with my ex-partner, had herself an ex-partner who was part of the FNF org. How was her judgement ever going to be balanced, when the main reason being that my barrister was keen to cross examine her?

CAFCASS has become the lackey of poor judges who can point at their reports as an excuse for making the wrong , and all too often irreversible judgements. CAFCASS has become the scapegoat for an already failing system and allows false allegations to have credence in these secret and sinister court rooms.As all that is required by them is to present the required report to expatiate matters swiftly to the judges liking which is more often then not far from just!
All too often they pander to feckless runaway dads who have little regard for their kids and self serving money grabbing mothers who want their own 'rewards' that the children rarely see the benefit of . Meanwhile Good loving Dads are being alienated from their children and undemanding and caring mother are not getting all they are entitled to in support of their children.

"Since the high profile cases such as Baby Peter, Victoria Climbe, and Khyra Ishaq social services have been keen to cover their backs and avoid the chastisement they face when things go wrong and they pretend to learn from it and move on , the trouble is they do not learn, they remain incompetent and out of their depth and as a result great swaths of innocent families are being caught up in their net of lies a deceit"Davey

Tuesday, 7 June 2011

Family Justice Review : Deadline 23rd June 2011:Grandparents4Justice!

I was touched this week by 2 articles in the June edition of Mature Times; Grandparents new heartache and Have we lost our Grandson forever? (Click blog title for more on this) I would implore David Norgrove as Chair of the Family Justice Review to rethink his interim view on the grandparents role in the family and on society as a whole. These bastions of commonsense and stability could be the answer to the whole Family Law issue in the UK and beyond,where feasible would it not be better for a grandparernt to care for their own children’s kids as opposed to social services in times of crisis? Even as the cynic in me believes the whole review is purely a cost cutting exercise rather then a true pursuit of justice, so here is a cheaper and morally better alternative!
Parental Alienation is also a force that undermines families and is not simply restricted to children and their dad but extended famly including grandparents and uncles & Aunties, and where the authorities are concerned all too often favor the parent who holds the children whilst ignoring the family stopped from having contact or access.
Presenter Gloria Hunniford has campaigned on this issues and Radio personality James Whale watched his own son be alienated from his granddaughter at the time he himself was diagnosed with cancer and to which he dedicated a whole chapter of his book ( Chapter 11 I believe)

I would not advocate our silver surfer’s climbing up something dressed as Spiderman, but aren’t they the true superheros anyway?

Lest we forget!

Lest we forget!
In the year we saw the last of the World War One ‘Tommy’s’ complete his journey on this earth and many World War Two warriors now considering how many more memorials they will attend especially in foreign lands, we appreciate what their lives and those who did not return stand for in giving us freedom of speech and a quality of life many of us take for granted and my thoughts of my late father a peace loving man facing the horror of war from the rear gunning turret of a Lancaster Bomber. (click on picture to see him arrive in the US) My Dad, Eddie (1921-1990)

Listen to the Children!

Listen to the Children!
click on picture for video

Dad is the WORD!

Dad is the WORD!
Darby Jay has a point doesn't he?

Family Justice review e-petition

Family Justice review e-petition
Sign against it NOW!

Roy Wood

Roy Wood
Tell me a story Minister! There ain't no time left to lose!


Are we all prisoners to ourselves?

You thought you had problems?

Time to fix this broken Family Law!


Has it caught up with us?

Are you Hammer or Anvil?

Are you Hammer or Anvil?
Even authority can become voulnerable when WRONG!

Family Justice Reform?

Family Justice Reform?
Lets work together!

It is all about the children...

It is all about the children...
..even at Buckingham Palace!

Kids......this is a role model!

Kids......this is a role model!
(I once saw Lennox Lewis in Mayfair, a big man not just in statue: Davey)

e-petiton for equal parenting in law!

e-petiton for equal parenting in law!
Not much to ask really!

Kings of Rock (any dispute?) click on Guitar

Kings of Rock (any dispute?) click on Guitar
Status Quo have not expressed their opinion of this site, this is just here for light relief to a heavy subject!

100 years on could this be the fete of our ecomony and democracy?

100 years on could this be the fete of our ecomony and democracy?
Ask Nigel Farage!


I hope so!

Just who exactly do they represent?

The Legacy!

The Legacy!
Daveyone Bows-Out!